Holding On and Letting Go

My thoughts are with the long-term unemployed. Those who for a year or more have desperately been trying to find work but who remain unsuccessful. For those of you who truly want work, but are continually not being recognized for your potential, the burden is heavy. Among the tragedies that can befall someone, such as the loss of a loved one or divorce, becoming chronically unemployed is a significant life challenge that only time, and persistence can heal. 

There comes a time when options seem few. Employers are learning how to cope with 1% – 2% GDP growth. Many of the jobs that existed for a few years are not coming back. And competition for the few jobs that are available is stiff. You need to be worried about your skills atrophying and your networks drying up. Politicians spend too much time in a debating society and do not seem to admit that the economy’s problems are largely beyond them. The world now seems like a hopeless place. 

But there is still you. Despite your inability to control external conditions no one has yet taken away your ability to perceive and respond to this situation. Whether you wanted it or not, this is a time to take stock. To reach deep down to see what you are made of and to get in touch with an inner strength you seldom have needed but do now. 

A big part of coping with the loss of employment is determining what to psychologically hang onto and what to let go of. What I mean by that is profoundly recognizing the value of what is most important in sustaining you as a self-reliant individual. Being able to rise above adversity and to not let it tear you down. This is your main goal. 

What and who in your life most helps you to do that? Perhaps it is family and close friends, people you serve who are less fortunate than yourself, or your community and its services. Fortifying actions that you take such as systematically following through with best job search practices despite the lack of immediate reward and keeping as current as possible with professions for which your skill set is a match are positive things to do. Be in touch with what still energizes you when it seems that most things around you are draining. These are worth holding onto. 

Equally important is observing what needs to be let go. It is possible that our egos are clinging to notions and long-held beliefs or perceptions that make this transitory time more difficult than it needs to be. For instance, linking your self-worth too tightly to your former job title and the status it brought you, still believing that you are entitled to the salary you received in 2007, seeing the world as one big competitive us-against-them environment, or keeping relationships with people who too often display self-defeating ideas can rob you of the positive energy you need most at this time. 

Do not be afraid to reach out. There are many who can be very constructive and are passionate about assisting you. Also, consider helping others in the same predicament as yourself. 

Self-reflection at the level that identifies what to hold onto and what to let go of may need to become part of your daily routine. This is best done while walking, running, or sitting quietly. Drinking and drugging tend to cloud the mind too much. Try to develop a greater degree of mastery over your mind that can come from purposeful contemplation. The benefits of doing so can last long after this very difficult time. 

Bill Ryan